As much as I hate to say it, setbacks are an inevitable part of the process of recovering from chronic illness. Just when you think everything is turning around, your progress stalls – or even reverses for seemingly no reason. Then comes the fear of slipping back into a cycle of never-ending misery, complete with questions that can fuel a sense of hopelessness: how long will this last? Will it ever get better? Do I have to live this way for the rest of my life?
The motivation to get healthy is easy. When you see hundreds of success stories and statistics like “93% of patients with (insert any chronic disease) went into remission following this diet” it’s enough to kindle a flame of home in anyone.
The journey to healing, however, is not all easy. Sure, for some, the weight comes off, the health issues go away in a matter of months, and they go on to live the life they always imagined. This post is for the other ones – those who are being 100% compliant, but not seeing quick results. Those experiencing another flare-up. And those with issues that went away, only to bring other issues to the surface.
Unfortunately, I am writing this because I am currently going through one of my first major setbacks. Sure, I’ve experienced small side-steps in my road to recovery, but nothing can compare to what I am experiencing right now.
I hate to admit it but my lack of discipline caused this flare. Since this pandemic began, my everyday routine/schedule has been forgotten about and truthfully, I got beyond comfortable with this whole quarantine life – going to bed late, waking up late, sometimes working out, sometimes not, eating whatever, whenever. My body performs best when I follow a routine. Whose doesn’t? It took months of trial and error before finding the right routine best suited for body. I’m actually very surprised that it took several weeks of neglect for everything to act up. That’s good news for me – if I continue giving my body the proper food and exercise, hopefully I’ll be in a lifetime remission. That’s the goal anyway…
Right now my pain is equivalent to the pain I experienced in August which put me in the hospital. Two reasons for not going, 1. Corona infested emergency rooms and 2. I know what needs to be done in order to get my symptoms under control. Most would probably do anything to get their pain under control and normally I would too. But for the first time in a while I feel like I’ve been living. I’ve been eating the things I used to eat without even thinking twice about it. I’ve stayed up past 2 o’clock in the morning which used to give me an insane amount of anxiety. Some days I skip working out and sit on the couch all day. I’m living life like the normal person and honestly I wouldn’t trade the past 3 weeks for anything. I got a taste of what my life used to be like and unfortunately I’m paying the consequence.
So you’re probably thinking, now what?
I’m not going to lie, I’m a little discouraged because it feels like all of the work I put in the past few months were for nothing. I’m back at square one. I’m going to have to live a very modified life until the pain becomes less severe and hopefully, in time, I’ll be able to reintroduce the foods and exercises back in that I worked very hard for the first time around. I know I’ll have to start slow because that’s what worked for me last time. And if I did it before and I’m sure I’ll be able to do it again. This time is a little different though, I have a wonderful support system now which I didn’t have before. This will most definitely make this fight a little easier.
And when I say start slow, I mean it: try one single exercise move one time. See how you feel. If that felt good, try another. It can be a sit-up, a leg lift, a squat, or a bicep curl, or a walk to the end of the driveway and back. If this one thing hurts you, lay down and try something else when you’re ready. The point is trying. Same applies to food. Don’t be discouraged if something you used to be able to eat hurts right now – just because it hurts today doesn’t mean it’s going to hurt tomorrow. (Read that sentence again.)
But just know this: a setback is just a bump in the road. Sometimes a big bump, but still just a bump – not a mountain. Fortunately, with time, setbacks gradually become less common and less tense. I’ve gotten better at self-analysis and self-correcting and am usually able to get back on track more quickly than the previous set back. When a setback occurs (and I know it will happen, many times over) I’ve learned to not become mired in depression and fear because from previous experience, that has held me back. I know it’s time to pull up my bootstraps and become proactive. I’ve got this.
Here’s to another successful journey.
